officially freaking out
Posted on | February 21, 2007 |
I’ve mentioned before how scheduling isn’t particularly a strength, and though I do own a calendar, I don’t seem to know how to use it. I’ve been going through this week happily thinking I had the ENTIRE WEEK of winter vacation (next week) off to work on my grad school application (20 page manuscript, shudder, cough) but um, it’s due on MARCH 1st which is actually in the middle of next week. Crap. Um. So.
I need you all to cross your fingers for me and tell me nice things and forgive my absence a possibly give me critical feedback if I get up the guts to post any of the work I’m submitting (some of the original ideas came from here actually.)
Can you do that? Because right now I feel like I totally suck and I have to teach two more days and I feel like I’m coming down with the stomach flu and by tonight I’m supposed to do wildly impossible things like email one of my profs from college a ’statement of purpose’ so that he can write a recommendation that’s up to date. Yipes. The stomach ache doesn’t help things. And seriously, why the fuck wasn’t I able to actually LOOK AT THE CALENDAR, before assuming I had 10 days to get this done, when really I have, oh, FOUR. Oh, and I have to be observed teaching tomorrow and I haven’t written up the plans for that (part of our yearly eval process.) Crap. crap. crap.
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25 Responses to “officially freaking out”
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February 21st, 2007 @ 8:14 pm
Breathe. You’ll be fine. The shortened timeframe will force you to focus, and you’ll end up producing a much better product as a result.
Trust me. I’m very psychic about these things.
Hang in there,
K.
February 21st, 2007 @ 8:39 pm
Wow. I’m having a panic attack for you. Hope you can get it all done!! And that the stomach bug stays far, far away.
February 21st, 2007 @ 8:40 pm
i know how you feel. really. i had so many freak out moments like this during the grad-school application process. but you will get it all done despite the seemingly impossible deadlines, and you will probably feel like hell at the end of it but it will be worth it - promise. you are a brilliantly talented writer - everyone who comments here will tell you that i am sure - so don’t let the worries and fears get you down. i managed to get my 25 page manuscript and all the other crazy things they make you write for those app’s done all at the last minute - and with morning sickness too - so i do know it is possible. best wishes. if you need anything, don’t hesitate to email - really.
February 21st, 2007 @ 8:58 pm
consider my fingers officially crossed. i’ll be sending you encouraging vibes - i KNOW you’ll get it all done in time.
February 21st, 2007 @ 9:58 pm
Honey, you’ve got this prayer minister crossing her fingers and ready to do a rain dance for you - I’ve still got ashes on my forehead from Ash Wednesday, so maybe my prayers will be extra powerful? You can do it, you can do it, what you write will be beyound excellent, beautiful, breathtaking indeed. You have a powerful gift! Never doubt that!
February 21st, 2007 @ 11:03 pm
I don’t know that I am worthy to critique, but I am happy to cheerlead. Go, Christina! GO!
February 22nd, 2007 @ 12:08 am
You are an amazing writer and will be an asset to any program lucky enough to have you. Trust me on this–I know good writing.
February 22nd, 2007 @ 12:32 am
sending warm, calm happy thoughts your way. You will complete the work that you need to, you will do well.. and come March 2nd you will have some time to relax after all of you hard work. take care. you can do this.
February 22nd, 2007 @ 3:51 am
breathe, breathe. You can do it. I hope the stomach bug is just nervous butterflies, but if not, maybe you can get an extension?
February 22nd, 2007 @ 6:39 am
At least you noticed it now - and it’s not too late yet! You seem like such a strong and wonderful person, so I am absolutely sure you will handle it. *smile*
Ich drücke dir die Daumen!
(Keeping my fingers crossed for you!)
*johanna*
February 22nd, 2007 @ 8:24 am
We are all too human aren’t we? I am in the same boat- different specifics, but the relatively the same boat.
February 22nd, 2007 @ 9:02 am
I’m ready to pitch in as an editor, if you need help, by blog or by email.
You CAN do this.
February 22nd, 2007 @ 11:40 am
Huh. Sounds like my entire college career. Somehow I still managed to stay on the Deans list… I have no doubt you can pull this off!
And I’m a great editor if you need a critical eye!
February 22nd, 2007 @ 1:13 pm
Christina, you seem like the kind of person who works very well under this type of pressure … I, too, did not receive the sometimes coveted organization gene, so I know how it feels when these important things come up. Trust in yourself, that gorgeous mind you were given, and that wonderful husband who will support you through this. And remember to get plenty of kisses from that little boy when you get REALLY stressed - that will put it all in perspective. Good vibes.
February 22nd, 2007 @ 1:24 pm
It’s that stupid short February and those stupid 28 days.
You can do it - and you have so much beautiful writing here on your blog you can lift from yourself and use for a manuscript.
Oh, and ice cream helps!
February 22nd, 2007 @ 2:10 pm
Oh come on Christine. Don’t worry. You sparkle and shine in your writing. You will get it done. BEst and I promise you will get it all done and beautifully too. Good luck and best wishes. Incidentally, I cannot organize to save my life, but have been managing so far..may be we are wired to work like this
February 22nd, 2007 @ 4:28 pm
breathe…breathe…breathe…
February 22nd, 2007 @ 7:55 pm
uhhh. Sounds like me. And … you’ll get through it.
February 22nd, 2007 @ 10:05 pm
Just one piece of encouragement/advice from someone who is chronically time-challenged as well: Start by writing out whatever it is you need to submit as it comes out of your head. Don’t worry about editing and perfecting as you go. Just get something on the page — and you can go back and revise later. But I find that when I am in a time crunch, and I have a lot to write, just getting the dang thing started is often the toughest part. I seem to always want to be perfect from the get-go… which means that many projects are doomed before they’re even started. I find that less obsession = better writing. And the good thing is, a tight timetable by its very nature gives you less time to obsess…
Good luck to you… I know you’ll be fine — because really, when you think about it, I’ll bet you can’t name a single time when something you were down to the wire on didn’t ultimately work out. See? Can’t name one…
Go get ‘em!
February 23rd, 2007 @ 1:18 am
If anyone can wow an admissions team, it’s you. Can’t say that I’d like to be in your place, but trust yourself. You’ll finish and I’m sure you’ll knock their socks off in the process.
And I can’t echo what Lynne says any more. Just get something down on paper.
February 23rd, 2007 @ 1:41 am
I love handicaps! They always make me try harder, and the result is always my best work. You’ll do great! But my fingers are crossed anyway
(like you need my help! go get ‘em!)
*s
February 23rd, 2007 @ 2:08 am
Visualize a smooth, easy and positive outcome. And don’t forget to breathe. It’ll all be okay. It always is…right?
Holding a good thought for you.
February 23rd, 2007 @ 5:14 am
oh how this reminds me of my college years and those sleepless nights working on screenplays at film school… I know you Christina, you can do it. you CAN do it.
February 23rd, 2007 @ 9:42 am
Any chance the stomach thing is stress-related?
Take a deep breath, find your center. Break the things you need to do down into smaller, less overwhelming parts and tackle them one at a time. Make a detailed list, so your mind isn’t trying to hold all the tasks in memory and you can let them go to focus on the task at hand. Focus on the first thing, then the next thing. Let go of any task that is non-essential so that you can meet the deadline. If you feel the panic creeping in, take a mini-break. Push back from the keyboard, go for a 10 minute walk, go snuggle Bean. Just walk away for a few minutes. Then come back and try again.
I’m the manager of a complex, fast-moving team at a big computer company. My co-workers tell me I’m always calm and two steps ahead of what needs to be done. I’m not, but the advice above is how I make it look that way.
You are an amazing teacher and an amazing writer. You can do this. And realize that since the deadline is in the middle of the week, that means you’ll have the rest of the week off, post-deadline, to be with your family. That’s a nice big carrot.
February 24th, 2007 @ 10:44 am
grad school WANTS you they WANT you– remember that– it’s all gonna work out, promise.