Urnalizing
Posted on | May 7, 2007 |
Alas. One day he will be big enough to use a urnal. In preparation for this event, I’ve done extensive research on the subject. What follows are a few directions to hopefully help him navigate that complex, highly technical piece of machinery.
1. Aim.
2. Go where you aim. Do NOT go on the floor or the surrounding walls.
3. Do not shake dry on the floor or surrounding walls.
4. Flush.
5. Please for the love of god, wash your hands.
6. Zip up before exiting .
I know, sounds easy, right? I think so too.
Except every time I use a unisex bathroom (or slip into the mens room because the line for the lady’s is immeasurably longer than my blader’s capacity is big,) the floor invariably has a sticky yellow trail edging downhill from the general direction of the urnal. What is up with that? Do you guys LIKE that sticky feeling on the soles of your shoes, and that horseflies-in-summer stench? Or is it really more complicated than I imagine?
Moving on.
Except really, we’re not. Because all things potty have become central to our daily lives here at casa mytopography. On good days this involves much cheering and hoopla for a job well done on: prior notifcation, proper underware removal, etc. However, there are the other days when Bean thinks it’s particularly intreguing to hide, in say, the central island cupboard, while pooping in his underpants. And then there is still his all consuming affection of going outdoors, which he does on his own, whenever he can–except that he can’t quite tilt his hips in the right direction so it likely goes all over the bib of his overalls or the waist of his jeans. Clearly there is more to this than meets the eye, people. But I can’t quite figure out what I’m missing here. Alas.
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5 Responses to “Urnalizing”
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May 8th, 2007 @ 9:03 am
Urinals are a scary thing in my books. When I have come across them, they have been filthy,smelly messes. Good luck with teaching the future generation:)
May 8th, 2007 @ 11:06 am
It’s a boy thing, trust me on this! My 5 yr. old still thinks poop is great. Likes to talk about it, give you details of it and 2 weeks ago, while in the bath, decided he’d try and poo in an empty shampoo bottle - all this while the jets to the jacuzzi were running:) This is what happens when you are folding towels two feet away from him! When asked why he did this, he just said “it was an idea I had” Help Me! Thank God that Dad does the whole bath thing. I think I would have just moved. I loved listening to the commentary from my husband and son sitting out of sight on the stair landing. Too, too funny. Imagine an almost 50 year old Optical Engineer, geek of the year, dealing with this. I love it!
I can laugh because I’ve already raised one child (a girl) who is now almost 20. I can tell you that,from my experience, girls do not do this sort of thing. We, as a whole, just aren’t that interested in poop or peeing outside or the whole bathroom experience in general;)I like to thing we are just a tad more civilized:)
Good luck!
Michelle
May 8th, 2007 @ 12:46 pm
the best idea is to give him a target. use a square of toilet paper or a cheerio and he has to make it sink. very fun. very effective. good luck
May 8th, 2007 @ 2:55 pm
Your little Bean is about 5 months older than my son. Your postings are harbingers of things to come for me. Potty training is something I am dreading. Wishing all of the mommies of little boys all the luck in the world with potty training!
May 9th, 2007 @ 12:24 am
Well, Carol took my idea.
I have heard that Cheerios work marvelously well.