Celebrating right now
Posted on | September 9, 2007 |
For DH’s birthday: I woke up to make pancakes and pick fresh flowers before heading out the door for work. In the evening we went out for dinner at an lovely little Italian place. Good wine. Excellent food: smoked/grilled fresh mozzarella with eggplant; pumpkin ravioli with duck; veal saltimbocca. Bean was a delight. A perfect example of manners and peaceable dining. He noshed on the pumpkin ravioli and daintily pretended the breadsticks were chopsticks. A perfect evening.
DH’s birthday comes two days after our anniversary—not our wedding anniversary, but our first-got-together one. Eight years. Pretty cool to know someone for nearly a decade, and to feel like time has flown.
Is this what it feels like forever? Time speeding up exponentially with each rotation of earth around sun? Until decades tumble down upon each other, and thus is a life? Is this really how it goes? Each moment so full, so poignant, so messy and rich and joyous, that it all seems like yesterday. I look at Bean, our shiny-eyed rascal of a boy, and I can’t see a baby in him any more. He’s all little boy. Rough and tumble and sweet. It makes me catch my breath.
We spend so much time looking forward to things, and then, so much time looking back. The moments in between, before the fruit is picked, before the seeds are spit. Sheer present; so hard to hold.
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12 Responses to “Celebrating right now”
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September 10th, 2007 @ 1:29 am
It is, indeed, how a life is built: looking forward and back. I love it when you post…you remind me how to write.
September 10th, 2007 @ 2:41 am
I spent yesterday evening sitting on the sofa and knitting a swatch. I was sitting there alone, listening to the radio, listening to the thoughts spinning, trying to remember which row it was I was working on that moment. I let my thoughts swirl around this number of the row, trying to remember what my life, my birthday had been like at that age. I started this with row number 16 and knit 33 rows all in all, letting the gap between 24 and 33 be filled with wondering what it might be like to be that age … I thought I had forgotten what my 19th birthday had been like, but then I remembered.
Sheer present, what might it be … just living, without thinking back or thinking ahead? Without spinning this net of memories which we are living, only a blink away?
September 10th, 2007 @ 7:04 am
What a great picture of you guys. Sounds like you had a fantastic birthday celebration! Miss all three of you.
September 10th, 2007 @ 9:56 am
I saw a special 60 Minutes last night on Luciano Pavorotti (growing up in an italian opera-loving household, he is part of me). When asked why he is in love with this particular woman half his age he replied that if you can explain why, then you are not in love. Your post reminds me of this … “Each moment so full, so poignant, so messy and rich and joyous” … just all passion. Three happy faces.
Glad you all had such a nice time.
September 10th, 2007 @ 10:28 am
It constantly amazed at how much time has passed while I hold my fella’s hand. But it still feels right so I try not to think too hard about the span of time behind us! And you three look so perfect together… like you were made for each other! Happy Birthday, Mr. Topography!
September 10th, 2007 @ 1:37 pm
So true about being in the moment. My photography professor in college first made me aware of how little time we actually spend there. Instead we are often looking forward to an event or dwelling on the past, or just not fully engaged in the present.
Time really does fly as the years go by, doesn’t it? Every year goes by faster than the one before it, and I don’t even have kids yet! I imagine it really soars then!
September 10th, 2007 @ 1:38 pm
PS - I think your comments might be in fully working order again!
September 10th, 2007 @ 2:17 pm
So well said. Beautiful. I think of your words as having flavor–as being able to read them a kind of good meal.
(My husband and I hit eight years of being together in July; we hit one month of marriage tomorrow.)
September 10th, 2007 @ 7:54 pm
That is what I find myself trying to do all the time now - hold on to the now. It seems so impossible to even remember things anymore, and I really try so hard. My 2nd son is already 7 months old, I honestly sit there looking at him trying to take it all in, and then I realize that I can’t remember what my 3 yr old was like when he was a baby, and it was only 3 yrs ago! Guess writing is the way to preserve time.
September 10th, 2007 @ 9:57 pm
Happy Belated Birthday to your guy! I love that you celebrate your first-got-together anniversary. Sometimes I wonder if that’s why I’ve had such resistance to a wedding. We already feel married, so it would be so strange to think of another day as being our anniversary…when we already have one.
If you think 8 years feels good, keep going. 
This is the life I’ve chosen and I see myself continuing to choose it daily/monthly/yearly. Not because I feel like I’ve committed to a path (or as some say, like I’ve already invested x number of years)…but because the scenery’s just getting interesting.
September 11th, 2007 @ 6:11 am
oh look at that PHOTO!!!! Cover of Style magazine, baby. Y’all are some kind of gorgeous!
September 11th, 2007 @ 11:44 pm
Gorgeous picture!!!
Sounds like you had a great time. You always lighten my day, make me smile and exhale.