Weasel

A weasel found it’s way into the coop, the way only weasels can. Murderous and thrilling at the kill, it went after every hen, the sick rooster (who was getting better!) first, taking their heads, leaving blood splattered across the glass panes on the door. When I came home DH was in the coop gathering […]

30 today

Update: because I’ve almost slipped off the face of the earth

* My laptop is in for repairs (the screen split down the side for no apparent reason) and I’m going through withdrawal trying to write on my old, slow HP.
* My rooster, who was attacked by a neighbor’s boyfriend’s dog, is dying. I am so sad, and feel so guilty and awful, not quite knowing […]

Fairy dust and climbing shoes

Another really long day.
And then, the best thing ever. We started our climbing class tonight, and as an early birthday present DH got me a new harness and shoes. In between trying on pairs of shoes–and while waiting for the sales guy to dig through his inventory for my size–I picked up a climbing magazine […]

The only difference

Friday night my heart felt like a hundred rain splattered puddles: each one reflecting a different small circle of cloud covered sky; so many different things to do all in exactly the same few moments.
Friday I was a flood of hormonal mood swings before I start to bleed, and I felt anxious and sad […]

Today as a (totally bummer) postcard:

I woke up late this morning. In the night the power had gone out and my alarm clock was blinking 3:45. I was late to a staff meeting.
The children were needy, needy, needy today.
I came home to a missing rooster who had been chased down the road to my neighbor’s house (several hundred […]

Puny

I have unreasonable expectations, constructed on scaffolding I can hardly climb, and from up there I sometimes get vertigo. When I sit down to do art, I feel them creeping up : that I’m not doing more, or better work. That it’s not good enough. It’s so lame, this inner voice. So useless, yet there […]

Dig in and read.

It is midwinter here in my small corner of the world and also in my blue-roomed heart. I’m tucked in, my pulse moving slowly and full of trepidation like water running under pale knocked together shards of ice. Self doubt circles like a pack of coyotes, their tracks mushy and dark where the earth collapses, […]

Leap

I sat down tonight to paint the way Bean does–with color first, then the image taking shape. I had no plan, no illustration in the back of my head, just the commitment to take a small corner of time out of my day to do art this month. It feels good to keep returning […]

My secret inner superhero

The other night I was talking to a friend. He said, “I don’t know, I guess I still feel like somewhere inside me is an inner superhero.”
I’m right there with him.
I still have that feeling: like one morning I’ll wake up and miraculously be able to live full throttle—without the shredded edges of tiredness […]